Not At All Appropriate
by BagginsPotterPevensie
Summary: Tag to 4x5; spoilers. Things are well in Camelot- that is, until Lord Agravaine opens his poisonous mouth. Gwen is left stunned and heart-broken so a certain Prat gets muddy in a valiant attempt to reach his Lady's heart. 'Are you blackmailing me? Yep.'


**A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed 'My Love, my King,' you motivated me to write this despite being unbelievably busy! Cheers!**

Gwen bit her lip anxiously as Merlin hurriedly pulled on his dark jacket on and slung his bag over his bony shoulders.

'You OK, Gwen?'

Gwen jumped. 'Yeah I'm fine, Merlin. It's _you_ I'm worried about, going on all these dangerous quests all the time and risking your neck every five seconds. Dressing up as a Knight of the realm, what on earth are you going to do next?'

'Gwen,' he laughed, humouring her. 'You know me, always the careful one, Gaius is more likely to get in trouble than me!'

She chuckled softly as he made his way over to her. Merlin was her dearest friend and he meant the world to her. It was difficult to place Merlin exactly, but Gwen definitely knew that he always managed to make her smile, even in the darkest of times.

He embraced her tightly and she hugged him back, telling herself that she would see him in few days at the very least.

A few moments later her friend Hafsa arrived with towels in her hands. Her mouth dropped open when she saw Merlin and she immediately began gabbling something about red rabbits in the kitchens, causing Gwen to laugh loudly at her awkwardness. Hafsa had had a crush on Merlin for God knows how long but Merlin still completely oblivious to it all, which was rather expected of him.

He made his way over to the door. 'Gwen?'

'Yes?'

'Don't miss me too much, hey?'

**0o0o0o**

Gwen hummed to herself as she bustled around her tiny kitchen, briskly doing her chores so she could turn in early for once.

She was murmuring a beautiful melody that her Mother had always sung to her as a child, while she happily splashed water in the bath, as she ran in the golden summer meadows with Elyan on her chubby legs, and as she lay sleeping softly at night, surrounded by her loving family.

Gwen couldn't have been happier at that glorious moment- everything was perfect and more. Merlin had returned safely from his utterly mad task, she was going out with her friends Sumaiya and Beth soon, Elyan was happy serving Camelot and living his dream, and she had barely been out of Arthur's company the last few days.

_Arthur. _He made her cheeks flush scarlet and her heart quicken in a way that other girls could only dream and wonder about. She gave a little twirl with her broom in her hand as she thought about him…and it was only the other day that Merlin had teased her about a little boy with chocolate-coloured skin and deep blue eyes!

Gwen started suddenly as she heard a loud knock at her door. _Who could it be?_ She wasn't expecting anyone, and it was late at night but she had a sneaking suspicion as to who it could be. She cautiously made her way over to the window and peeked through it carefully, then stifled a laugh as she caught sight of a blue cloak- it was none other than her charming Sir William!

She swiftly grabbed her white shawl that was upon the dresser and then finally opened the door. 'Arthur!' she smiled happily.

The moment he entered, Gwen knew there was something wrong. It was written all over him- in his blue eyes so wide and filled with despair, his shoulders lumped with pain and the way he held himself tightly as though he was restraining himself from holding her in his loving embrace.

His words washed over her, drowning her. She didn't understand this at all- this was _not_ Arthur Pendragon, the man she had come to understand and love despite the numerous odds stacked against them. For a moment she was frozen, her heart refusing to believe what her mind was telling her. Then she suddenly realised that Arthur didn't actually mean this, she could see that plainly. This wasn't his decision, he didn't want this at all and it was hurting him too.

When he finally left her house with his stinging words pounding in her head, Gwen didn't do anything at first. She didn't wail or scream or throw herself onto her bed the way she had done when her Father had died and she had been engulfed in shock, thinking she was all alone in a cold and empty world.

Instead, she leaned against her small table where she and Arthur had first had a candlelit dinner together; breathing deeply as she clutched the necklace Elyan and Tom had given her in her 17th birthday for support like it was her rock in her deep ocean of despair. She began singing her Mother's melody again; surprised she still had her voice with her. At first she sounded quiet and rather hoarse like the way it was when she had a dreadful cold that left her bed-ridden, but then her volume slowly rose, and she sung loudly, desperate not to cry. But even Gwen couldn't deny the tell-tale quivering in her normally perfect soprano.

_I could've been a princess, you'd be my King_

_Could have had a castle, and wore a ring_

The next day was even worse, if that was possible. Her heart felt as though it had been slashed to pieces with a dagger edged with all the pain in the world, the stuff Morgana was made of in her twisted mind. Gwen tried to find some hate for Arthur in her heart, some anger_, anything, _but she couldn't. All she felt was his pain at thinking that he had to this all alone, that he had to push his friends and those he cared about away.

When Elyan came over for breakfast and to bid her goodbye as he left with the others to fight Carleon's army, she tried to act indifferent; like nothing had happened. But Elyan was just as observant as her and nothing ever got past him- perhaps it was a Leodegrance thing.

'Gwen?' he asked gently, as he set down his bowl of porridge. 'What's wrong?'

Part of her wanted to break down completely, to sob into his shoulder and tell him everything that had happened last night. How her world had been turned upside down, her soul shattered.

But the other part, the stubborn and independent part, screamed something else. Elyan was just about to ride out to battle; he was prepared to lay down his life for Camelot, his home. Why couldn't she do the same, was she really that selfish?

So she swallowed softly, fighting the painful lump in her throat. She smiled brightly at him. 'Nothing, really. Don't worry.'

He raised his eyebrow in a perfect imitation of Gaius. 'You can't hide anything from me, Gwencakes. C'mon, what is it? You can tell me anything…well, not _anything_.'

_Why are you so damn smart?_

She smiled faintly. 'Fine, I'll tell you. But promise you won't laugh?'

He grinned. 'On my honour, fair Lady.'

'Well…I…I was sweeping the floor last night. And then I heard a loud noise…'

He leaned forward in anticipation, propping himself on his elbows. 'What was it?'

'There was a mouse. A _big_ one and it scared me so much! I had a nightmare!'

He burst out laughing, guffawing loudly. Gwen's fear of mice was legendary for she could deal with spiders and worms and all other bugs and crawlies, but mice were something different altogether for her.

'You promised you wouldn't laugh, Elyan!' she exclaimed, feigning hurt.

'I couldn't help it!' he replied, wiping his eyes. 'I'd almost forgotten how frightened you are of them1 D'you remember the time when Aunt Mage came over and there was one under her chair so she set it on fire?'

This time Gwen laughed at the bittersweet memory, her cheeks glowing. She continued to laugh and talk with Elyan until a trumpet sounded from outside and it was time for him to leave. She hugged and kissed him tightly; warning him to be careful or she'd kill him herself.

**0o0o0o**

'Why are we stopping, Sire?' Percy asked curiously, voicing everyone's thoughts as Arthur halted in the middle of the road which caused the whole army to stop.

Arthur flushed red. 'I…I have to get something. Why don't you guys take a rest? I'll only be a few moments.'

Merlin watched Arthur curiously, wondering what he was up to. The whole ride back he had looked so preoccupied and Merlin wondered what was so important. He clambered off his horse as Arthur did and followed him onto a side road. 'Merlin? Go back to the others, quit following me around.'

'What're you up to?'

'None of your business! Can't a guy have a few minutes to himself?'

'In the middle of an abandoned path?'

'_Mer_lin!' Arthur exclaimed frustratedly.

'Fine, fine, I'll leave you in peace! Don't blame me if you get in trouble and I'm not there to help!' Merlin said, running off. The moment Arthur' back was turned however, he doubled back and continued to follow him around, interested in what the prat was looking for.

Arthur grumbled to himself as he wandered down the path, staring at the numerous plants and bushes growing by the side. He never actually paid attention to detail and never took time to notice the beauty of nature all around him. Now he did, taking a deep breath as he searched for lilac flowers, knowing they were Guinevere's favourite colour.

Finally, he located them at the bottom of the ravine, growing in a small corner. _Great._ Of all the bloody places it could have been, it was in the deepest pit possible. Arthur squared his shoulders. Guinevere deserved this at the very least after the appalling way he had treated her, especially after he had promised that things would be different when he was King.

He swallowed deeply before jumping into the ravine, and managed to land safely by squatting on his haunches. Merlin's mouth dropped open comically as he watched from behind a rock. _Was he feeling suici__dal?_

Arthur gently pulled the flowers from their roots and then dusted the soil off, wanting them to look as pretty as possible. He ripped a strip of cloth from the bottom of his shirt and then bundled the flowers safely inside, then put his hand to his hip to reach for his sword.

It wasn't there.

_Oh God, no._ He had left it in his bag, something Merlin would do! How the hell was he supposed to get out now and back to Camelot? He had to do something if he wanted to see Gwen again, so he made his way to the wall of rocks and began clambering them laboriously, huffing and puffing loudly. He had almost reached the top when he realised he couldn't go any further unless he wanted to break his neck- the rocks had become too steep for him to climb.

He tried to remain calm, but it was impossible. _He was trapped in a dark pit with nothing but the clothes on his back and a bunch of flowers. _'Merlin!' he squeaked helplessly.

'Looking for me, Sire?'

Arthur yelled in shock as he looked up to see Merlin's grinning face looking down at him. 'What the _hell_ are you doing here?' he asked furiously.

'Oh well if you want me to leave, then I can-'

'Merlin, get me out of here or I'll have your head!'

'Course, Sire!' he grinned, tossing down some rope from his bag. 'Grab hold of this.'

'Merlin, wait. Take these first. And _shut up.' _Arthur warned as he stretched and dropped the flowers into Merlin's palm.

'Of course. That is, until I get you out. What would you do without me, huh?

Arthur tightened the length of rope around his waist, secretly thanking God. 'OK Merlin, haul me up.'

Perhaps Arthur had gotten heavier, or Merlin had lost weight, or the ground was too slippery, or the rope simply wasn't made for hauling Kings out of pits. Whatever the reason, things went well until Arthur was almost at the top. He looked up to see Merlin's face contorted in pain and his breaths coming out quick and shallow, causing him to have a humiliating flashback of when he had tried to sneak out of the castle to see Morgause.

'Merlin, don't let go of the rope!' he literally begged.

Merlin let go of the rope, and Arthur fell back into the pit- right into a bird's nest. He jumped up spluttering and flailing around, wiping waste from his face. '_MERLIN!'_

'Sire, shush!' Merlin exclaimed, shaking his head disapprovingly. 'If you shout like that the Knights will hear and then come to investigate!' He knew he was clutching at straws, but that was the only way to deal with a deranged Arthur.

'Just get me out of here before I banish you to the bottom of the Sea!' Two attempts later, and Merlin finally had a red-faced Arthur free. He opened his mouth, presumably to scream at him but Merlin held his hands up 'You pick on me, and I'm telling Gwen you're scared to sleep with the curtains closed. Beat that.'

Arthur closed his moth immediately, and then opened it again. 'Are you _blackmailing_ me?'

'Well spotted, Sire.'

Meanwhile, Gwen was busy in the place, helping Bess prepare a feast for the proud victors. 'Princess?' she turned as she heard Gwaine call out to her.

'What is it?'

'Gaius wants you, as in not like _that; _he wants you to help him out.'

She laughed and rolled her eyes at the cheeky night. 'Not everyone thinks like you do, Gwaine!'

'Pity, aint it?'

She rushed off to find Gaius in his rooms, pottering around with some small flask and bottles in his hand.

'Ah Gwen, thanks for coming. Are you busy, dear?' he asked, peering up at her.

'No, not at all,' she lied. In fact she was completely swamped with chores and things to do but she wasn't about to tell Gaius that. He was so kind and helpful, and hand been like Father to both her and Merlin for many years.

'Good girl. Can you do me a favour? Arthur's just returned with his men and he'll obviously be tired, so I prepared this simple draught which will help him rest and ease the pain of his journey. Will you deliver it to him for me?' Gaius wasn't blind despite his old age as most people thought; he had observed both Gwen and Arthur recently and noticed they had both seemed down and depressed. Lovers always had tiffs and small fights, but if you left them to brew it could turn into something ugly.

Gwen hesitated for a fraction of a second. _But Arthur said we were over, what if he still doesn't want to see me? But Gaius needs my help!_

'Of course, Gaius,' she smiled. 'It won't be any trouble.' But as she left the room with the draught in her hands she didn't see him sigh heavily, wandering if he had done the right thing or if things would only get worse because of him. Only time would tell.

Gwen's heart was beating furiously as she made her way up the familiar route to Arthur's chambers. _Just go in there quickly and give it to him, it's no big deal_ she tried to convince herself. But her heart was telling her something completely different.

She knocked on the door, biting her lip. 'Come!' she heard his voice drawl out lazily and she couldn't help but smile, but as she quickly entered she schooled her features into an expression of nonchalance.

'Gwen!' he called out in surprise, jumping up from his large and luxurious bed eagerly. She was stunned- what on earth did he think he was doing? She placed the jug on a nearby table and turned to find him standing directly in front of her, smiling rather nervously.

'These are for you,' he offered, stretching out his palm and presenting her with a few bedraggled lilac flowers. One immediately wilted pathetically and Arthur's mouth twitched slightly. 'They're not much, I know. I picked them by the side of a road.'

Gwen couldn't say exactly what she was feeling at that moment; her emotions were completely out of control. Arthur understood now, he realised that he wrong and that he wasn't alone in this weird journey called life. He was _sorry. _Sorry wouldn't change what had happened between them or how he had hurt her but he couldn't turn back time, and she didn't want him to. It had made her stronger, she realised. And he had picked these flowers for her by himself- for a mere servant!

**0o0o0o**

'Red suits you.' Gwen assured her. 'You look completely stunning!' She was at a clothes stall in a calmer market than the one in the Square with her friends, doing some girl-shopping and lazily having fun since they all had a day off work in celebration of Camelot's victory.

'You think so?' Sumaiya beamed. 'So should I wear it for the Festival with my dark shawl?'

'Definitely.' Gwen agreed heartily. 'You could-'

'Guinevere?'

Gwen whipped around, her hair flying. 'Ar- Sire?' she smiled radiantly.

'Guinevere, I was wondering if you could do me a small favour? That is, if it's not too much trouble?' he asked charmingly, ever the perfect gentleman.

She turned to her friend, but Sumaiya simply laughed. 'Go on,' she whispered, pushing Gwen forward. 'You can tell me all about it later!'

Feeling light-headed, Gwen made her way over to Arthur who promptly pulled her onto his horse and she wrapped her arms around his waist. Things were different now. It would take some time for her wounds to be fully healed and to forgive him _completely_, but Arthur knew that and they were comfortable with that notion. After all, you can't have a rainbow without rain. 'Comfortable?' he asked her gruffly, smirking.

'No, she whispered seductively in his ear. 'But I soon will be…'


End file.
